A word about staying at home
There have been a lot of conversations among feminists over the past several decades about how motherhood affects a woman's ability to participate in other spheres of society. The phrase "stay at home mother" has become the catch-all phrase for describing women who spend a great deal of their time being the primary care provider for their children. Truthfully, I don't quite hate the expression. But, I am getting closer every day.
Generally, SAHMotherhood is understood to be the state of having someone else, (probably the mother's partner, the child's other parent, etc) be the wage earner of the family. It is actually an arrangement that makes a great deal of sense. Except that we don't live in a world where people's work is paid with the assumption that they will be supporting an entire family. Certainly, a pretty solid portion of the population cannot support their family on a single income. A lot of people who are understood to be SAHMs are actually working weekends and evenings or from home, or in my case, some combination.
Many people think that I am a stay at home mother. Which makes sense because my partner works full time and my daughter does not go to day care. What boggles my mind is that when I am AT WORK at my coffee job, people ask me if I am a stay at home mother. I work on weekends and have friends watch my daughter on the one day each week when my partner can't. I am away from her about 20 hours each week. That doesn't even include the hours that I log each week doing development work for a small non-profit. During an average week, I work about 36 hours, (before we get into the several volunteer positions that I hold.) Most people would consider that employed.
Not to mention that caring for a little person is a lot of work. Although there are many benefits to spending so much time with my little one, a free and easy lifestyle is not among them. It is important to me that even women who are not working a 9-5 jobs be recognized for ALL that they contribute.
There have been a lot of conversations among feminists over the past several decades about how motherhood affects a woman's ability to participate in other spheres of society. The phrase "stay at home mother" has become the catch-all phrase for describing women who spend a great deal of their time being the primary care provider for their children. Truthfully, I don't quite hate the expression. But, I am getting closer every day.
Generally, SAHMotherhood is understood to be the state of having someone else, (probably the mother's partner, the child's other parent, etc) be the wage earner of the family. It is actually an arrangement that makes a great deal of sense. Except that we don't live in a world where people's work is paid with the assumption that they will be supporting an entire family. Certainly, a pretty solid portion of the population cannot support their family on a single income. A lot of people who are understood to be SAHMs are actually working weekends and evenings or from home, or in my case, some combination.
Many people think that I am a stay at home mother. Which makes sense because my partner works full time and my daughter does not go to day care. What boggles my mind is that when I am AT WORK at my coffee job, people ask me if I am a stay at home mother. I work on weekends and have friends watch my daughter on the one day each week when my partner can't. I am away from her about 20 hours each week. That doesn't even include the hours that I log each week doing development work for a small non-profit. During an average week, I work about 36 hours, (before we get into the several volunteer positions that I hold.) Most people would consider that employed.
Not to mention that caring for a little person is a lot of work. Although there are many benefits to spending so much time with my little one, a free and easy lifestyle is not among them. It is important to me that even women who are not working a 9-5 jobs be recognized for ALL that they contribute.
Labels: motherhood, Stay at home
posted by christy at 1:13 PM
5 comments
